Waiting...

It's been about a year and a half since I created this blog hoping it will help potential birth parents get to know us a little better. We have been very busy while hoping for the chance to adopt again. Stella will be 7 in May, Tristan 4 in one month and Bill and I? Let's just say we're older too! We have gone on several camping trips, had lots of fun outings, and best of all took the kids to Disneyland and the ocean for the first time! We can't wait to go back SOON!

I will admit that waiting for a year and a half isn't the easiest. I wonder if it will ever happen for us and I'm very hopeful it will. I know having my two children keep my mind off of the wait more than it would otherwise, however I do think daily of when, how and if another child will complete our family. I wonder if it will be a boy or a girl. What they will look like. I love adoption and can't imagine our family any other way. I am thankful every day for such a beautiful gift. I've been fortunate to see how it has blessed not only our lives, but our children's biological families as well.

Anyways, I am rambling now. I just wanted to post some recent pictures and a few random thoughts since it's been so long.

Last year I started taking a picture everyday to document our everyday lives. I am doing that again this year because I enjoyed it so much and helps me remember all the little (and big) things we did together.

When Boy Meets Girl...

Bill and I met country dancing. Bill asked me to dance and it was only a few days after Christmas. He was so cute talking about his little nephews and asking how my holidays were. We definetely hit it off and were having a good time. He asked for my number, which of course I gave him. Our first date was a Monster Truck show. Yes, we were rednecks at the time. As I mentioned in my letter on our profile, this is when he offered the upset child some of his candy to try and cheer him up. I just thought not many 20 year old guys would even think to do something like that! It showed me how thoughtful he was of others.

Everything about us clicked! We would talk for hours and had so much fun together. We had many of the same interests and the same goals for life. We were engaged by June and were engaged for another 5 months. We were married in the Salt Lake Temple on Dec. 1, 1999. It was snowy and cold, but I couldn't have cared less! It was the happiest day of my life (up to that point anyway)and nothing would ruin it for me. After the temple we had a ring ceremony for those that couldn't attend the wedding. We wanted to make sure everyone we loved could be a part of that special day!



Of course we had a country/Christmas themed wedding. Not exactly what I would choose for myself these days, but it was a lot of fun! We spent a week in Hawaii and loved the warm get-away in December! I was pretty excited to come back to our new home and start our new lives together. Fortunatly for me Bill is great at saving which is why we were able to go to Hawaii and buy a home when we got married! That was something I had to learn. I spent money as quick as I got it!

Our first week home was not what you'd expect between locking myself out of the house first thing in the morning without a spare key and flooding our basement, but we were able to laugh about it and knew if we could survive that first week we'd be OK. That certainly wasn't the toughest thing we've had to endure in the last 10 years (wouldn't that be nice?), but any obstacles and trials that have come our way we have been a team and gotten through it together!

This December will mark our 10 year wedding anniversary and at times it feels like just yesterday we were excitedly taking the elevator up to the sealing room to make those sacred promises to one another. A lot has happened since that day and I have been grateful everyday to have my best friend to share lifes little and big moments with. This past decade has been filled with love, laughter, joy, peace, and happiness! I can't wait to see what the next 10 years will be like...

I Said A Prayer For You

This poem was written on a plaque that I gave to Tristan's birth mother. I liked it and think it applies to our situation!


I said a prayer for you today
And know God must have heard
I felt the answer in my heart
Although He spoke no word.

I didn't ask for wealth or fame
I knew you wouldn't mind.
I asked him to send treasures
Of a far more lasting kind!

I asked that he be near you
At the start of each new day;
To grant you health and blessings
And friends to share your way!

I asked for happiness for you
In all things great and small.
But it was His loving care
I prayed for most of all!

Infertile Myrtle

So, this is the story that kind of let up to adoption #3. After our emotional wait for Tristan, Bill has been hesitant to try the process again. I can't say that I blame him either! There were a few times that we thought it wouldn't happen and that was very stressful for us. Anyway, he knows that I have always dreamed of having 3 kids ever since I was little. Its been my magic number. He suggested trying fertility treatments again. I was open to the idea of trying again, and hoped for the best!

We met with a specialist a month later and started all the fun testing again. It has been about 7 years since we've done all of this kind of stuff. To rule out some options I had a laparoscopy done in March. We found out that I didn't have endometriosis like we were thinking, but my tubes were blocked. This was a pretty devastating diagnosis for me to get because there is really no way to clear them up! The doctors suggested IVF. No thanks!

I have never had the desire to do that. I started looking into natural ways that might help, but never really did anything about it. I hated all the feelings that crept back with infertility treatments. I had made peace with it so many years ago and I didn't want to go through all of this again.

There was a second that we though maybe a girl who had just given birth & might want to put her up for adoption. I told my friend (who is related to the girl) that if she doesn't think she'll keep her, Bill and I will take her! She decided to keep her. I certainly didn't get my hopes up about the baby since it was so quick, but it did open up a conversation about adoption! Bill and I decided that even though we are happy with Stella and Tristan, we would like to have one more to complete our family! We both felt good about our decision to put our papers in at this time and immediately called the caseworker that helped us last time. I finally felt at peace with everything that had happened over the past few months.

After Stella was born everyone said, "Just wait, now you'll get pregnant!" I always replied, "Nope, I don't think so! This is how we're suppose to have our family and I don't think I'll ever get pregnant." Ever since I was little I have wanted to adopt whether I had my own biological children or not! So naturally for me adoption was an easy choice. I have loved the way our children have come into our family and wouldn't change it for the world! I am hopeful that we will be blessed once again and look forward to adopting all over again! Thank goodness I'm an Infertile Myrtle!

Traditions

I have to admit we don't have a ton of family traditions. However, the few that we do have I truly enjoy and hope my kids will grow up having good memories of them as well. My family (Alicia)has dinner every other Sunday together. We rotate who's house we have it at and everyone brings something, but it is something we have done since my oldest brother got married and has continued since! We love to get together and have a good time. We are very involved in each other's lives and support one another.


I love holiday traditions! I tend to get excited for the holidays around August. I love everything about them! We have started a new tradition. For the past three years we get together with our neighbors, and favorite friends, for soup before going trick-or-treating. It gets us warm before going out in the cold weather. Our kids are the same age and are best friends, so it's always a lot of fun to get together.

Christmas Eve my parents would always give us new pajama's to wear. I loved that! It was something I would look forward to. Who doesn't love early presents??? Sometimes my mom would make them to match. Yes, she was that kind of mom. The one who likes to match her kids clothes. I do remember a beautiful white night gown she made for me when I was 5 or 6 years old. Just a few years ago my mom got everyone, even the adults, new pajamas. We couldn't resist changing and taking a few pictures. It was so much fun!


We would also draw names for Christmas and exchange those presents on Christmas Eve. Now days we spend Christmas Eve (my favorite day of the year) with my family. We usually have a big dinner, visit my nephew's grave and sing a few carols to him, then come back to my parents for presents and games. Christmas Day we spend the afternoon with Bill's family. We always have a big lunch and take turns watching each other open presents.

Every year we go camping with Bill's family at Fish Lake. That is where so many of his childhood memories stem from! He loves it there and we enjoy going as a family too.

Oh, How They Grow!

Now Tristan is 2 1/2 and Stella is over 5. It has been amazing watching Stella and Tristan become the little people that they are today! They have such a natural kinship with one another. They truly love each other and care about the other's happiness. Stella is such a mother hen to Tristan. The other day she actually buckled him into his car seat! That made me laugh! And he follows her around like a lost puppy. He does everything that she does and wants to be just like her. They are opposites in every way imaginable, but their differences are what make them who they are! We love each of them for their unique personalities and characteristics.

Stella is funny, sweet, kind, animated, and loving. She makes friends wherever she goes and only sees the good in others. I love that about her! I hope she will always have some of that innocence as she grows up and gets older. She has such a big heart!

Tristan is smart, passionate, persistent, and energetic. He is a busy boy and loves to try anything and everything. Once he gets his mind set on something he doesn't give up until he figures it out. This can be a blessing and a curse! I love his dedication, but he tends to get frustrated when he can't get it at first.

They both grow so fast that I can't believe already how quickly time goes by. Stella's in Kindergarten now and next year Tristan will be in pre-school. I make sure to savor every moment of it. It took us so long to get to this point and I never take it for granted! There is no where I would rather be than with my family!

About A Boy

In January 2007 we found out we would be welcoming a baby boy! He was born a month and a half after we'd found out. We had one face-to-face meeting with his birth mother before he was born. In the meantime we had exchanged emails on a regular basis. When we first met her she wanted to have a more closed adoption. She felt that would help her move on a little better. Of course would respect whatever her wishes were.

The wait wasn't quite as smooth sailing as it was for Stella. We were nervous about a couple of things, but thankfully our prayers were answered. We were honored to be in the delivery room when Tristan was born! He was healthy and beautiful! The next 24hours were the longest of my life. His birth mother was having second thoughts, and we had already begun to bond with Tristan. We had held him, gave him his first bottle, and loved him before he was born. Of course we could understand her having second thoughts! She had carried him and loved him for 9 months! But as an adoptive couple there is nothing scarier and more nerve wracking than those hours until the papers are signed.

The day after he was born our worker called and asked if we could meet her ASAP at the hospital. We left immediately. Tristan's birth mother had signed her papers just before we signed ours. We spent a few moments together one more time before she handed her to me. All of those emotions I had for Dellany almost three years before, I had once again for this amazing woman. I was glad this time I knew a little more what to expect. It certainly doesn't get any easier though! We took a few pictures then each went on our way.

Our families came over that night to meet our new little addition. Everyone was thrilled to have Tristan in our family after an emotional couple of months. We kept in close contact through email with Tristan's birth mother after that. She has expressed several times since placement how thankful she is to us for being ready for Tristan and how grateful she is for how everything had turned out.

About 6 months after Tristan was born we met with both of Tristan's birth parents for lunch. This was the first time we had seen his birth mom since placement, so we were excited to see her again. And this would be our first time meeting Tristan's birth dad. Tristan looked exactly like his birth dad, only a lighter version of him. We had a great time and have gotten together several times since. We see them about twice a year. They came to Tristan's blessing and we get together every year for Tristan's birthday. It's always a joyous occasion for us! His birth mom expressed that she would like to have our adoption be a little more open than we had discussed at our initial meeting. That was what we had always known and were comfortable with. We agreed and have loved getting to know both of Tristan's birth parents!